Aug 10, 2011

Being A Parent....

Whatever they grow up to be, they are still our children, and the one most important of all the things we can give to them is unconditional love. Not a love that depends on anything at all except that they are our children...

It has been said that children are like wet cement. Whatever falls on them makes an impression.  As many of you know I have no children.  This I have come to terms with, but every so often it breaks my heart knowing that I have none and that many that do have them sure don't deserve them. 

Today I am in one of those moods where after witnessing a mother with her children it just broke my heart to see so much neglect, so much indifference and so little love coming from the mother to the kids.  Granted I only saw the family for a mere half hour or so, but it triggered something in me and all of a sudden I really wished at that moment that this woman did not have those children.  I wished instead that it was me. 

I saw the looks on the kids and what I saw just made me so very sad.  It was as if they were just begging for a little attention...even scraps would have been preferable compared to what they had...NOTHING!  Parents sometimes do not realize how hurtful their words are.  Remember mom and dad whoever you are, if you want your children to improve, let them overhear the nice things you say about them to others.

Parents are supposed to be there to protect their children, to shelter him/her from "bad" matter how old your child it, it is still your duty (one borne out of love) to make sure your child knows that he/she is a miracle, that since the beginning of the world there hasn't been, and until the end of the world there will not be, another child like him/her.

As Dr. Joyce Brothers has said,  "If a child is given love, he becomes loving ... If he's helped when he needs help, he becomes helpful. And if he has been truly valued at home ... he grows up secure enough to look beyond himself to the welfare of others"

I have always been a true believer in that not because you brought a child into this world it makes you a good parent.  Anyone can have a child, but not anyone can be a dad or a mom.  It takes that someone special with patience, dedication, sacrifice, devotion, sleepless nights and unconditional love.  Someone who is willing to put their childs needs ahead of theirs....I am not a mom, I have nieces and nephews and to me they mean the world and anyone tries to hurt them they would definitely have me to deal with.  

We have been and still are lucky to have wonderful parents, and the great upbringing we've had.  To this day I know if I should need my parents they would drop everything and be by my side...same they would do for any of their other 4 sisters.  They are full time parents.  They did everything with us and everything for us....

Here is a poem I found about parents with regrets.  Hope this is not you one of these days:

If I had my child to raise over again
I'd build self-esteem first and the house later
I'd finger paint more and point the finger less
I would do less correcting and more connecting
I'd take my eyes off my watch and watch with my eyes
I would care to know less and know to care more
I'd take more hikes and fly more kites
I'd stop playing serious and seriously play
I would run through more fields and gaze at more stars
I'd do more hugging and less tugging
I'd see the oak tree in the acorn more often
I would be firm less often and affirm much more
I'd model less about the love of power
And more about the power of love.

Remember...don't forget to hug your child today and to let him/her know how much they mean to you.  Don't forget to tell them how much you love them.

Children will not remember you for the material things you provided but for the feeling that you cherished them....

until next time...